Surviving the Holidays

The holidays are often described as “the most wonderful time of the year,” but for many, that phrase feels far from reality. Instead of joy and celebration, this season can stir feelings of grief, stress, or unmet expectations. Research shows that 64% of people with mental health challenges report that the holidays worsen their symptoms. But here’s the good news: Jesus doesn’t wait for us to have it all together. His invitation is for the weary:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” – Matthew 11:28

This guide isn’t about pretending everything is fine. It’s about meeting God where you are, practicing grace for yourself and others, and finding peace, joy, and hope in the midst of the mess.


Practical Ways to Navigate the Holidays

1. Name What You’re Feeling

Acknowledging your emotions is a vital first step. God made us to feel deeply, and naming emotions like grief, anxiety, or anger creates space for us to bring them to Him.

“Ignoring our emotions is turning our back on reality. Listening to our emotions ushers us into reality. And reality is where we meet God.” – Pete Scazzero, Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

🧠 Did you know? Naming emotions reduces their intensity. Jesus Himself wept at the tomb of His friend Lazarus (John 11:35), modeling the power of expressing grief.

Reflection: What emotions are you carrying into this season? Spend time journaling or praying, honestly naming them before God.

2. Accept That This Year Will Be Different

Circumstances like loss, financial strain, or changing family dynamics can make the holidays feel different from what we expect. That’s okay. Letting go of old expectations frees us to embrace this season for what it is.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” – Ecclesiastes 3:1

🕊️ Practice: Create new traditions that honor your current reality. Simpler, quieter celebrations can hold deep meaning.

3. Plan for Emotional “Triggers”

Triggers—unexpected reminders of grief, stress, or nostalgia—can catch us off guard. Being aware of them helps us prepare and respond with intention. Examples of holiday triggers:

  • Grief: Missing a loved one during gatherings.

  • Guilt: Feeling inadequate for not meeting holiday expectations.

  • Obligations: Feeling overwhelmed by travel, events, and hosting duties.

  • Loneliness: Experiencing isolation when surrounded by images of togetherness.

  • Nostalgia: Longing for past holidays or happier times.

  • Sense of Time Passing: Reflecting on aging, unmet goals, or life changes.

  • Social Pressure: Feeling obligated to attend events or “be cheerful.”

  • Feeling Left Out: Seeing others celebrate can deepen feelings of exclusion.

  • Financial Stress: Struggling to meet gift-giving or celebration costs.

  • Family Dynamics: Tensions or unresolved conflicts resurfacing at gatherings.

  • Neglecting Health: Overindulging or skipping routines can leave you drained.

  • Heightened Expectations: Unrealistic cultural ideals of a “perfect holiday.”

“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7

🎯 Pro Tip: Anticipate potential triggers and build in moments of rest and self-care.

4. Be Brave Enough to Say “No”

Jesus often withdrew to quiet places to rest and pray (Luke 5:16). Saying no to draining commitments allows you to protect your peace.

🛑 Action Step: Practice gracious ways to decline:

  • “Thank you for thinking of me, but I’m focusing on rest this season.”

  • “I’m simplifying my commitments this year, so I’ll have to pass.”

5. Limit Social Media

Social media can amplify feelings of inadequacy by showing others’ highlight reels. It often feeds unhealthy comparison.

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” – Theodore Roosevelt

🎯 Challenge: Set boundaries for scrolling. Replace that time with prayer, journaling, or other soul-nourishing practices.

6. Lean on Your Community

God created us for relationships. Trusted friends, family, or church members can provide strength and encouragement during tough seasons.

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.” – Galatians 6:2

🌱 Action Step: Identify safe people you can lean on. If needed, seek professional counseling. It’s not a weakness—it’s wisdom.

7. Give Yourself Grace

God’s love isn’t conditional on your performance or emotional stability. He calls you to rest in His unshakable grace.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

💡 Affirmation: You are not defined by your mistakes, struggles, or emotions. You are a beloved child of God.

Reminder: In Jesus, You Are:

  • Sought After: (Isaiah 62:12)

  • Precious in His Sight: (Isaiah 43:4)

  • A New Creation: (2 Corinthians 5:17)

  • Not Condemned: (Romans 8:1)

  • Forgiven: (Colossians 1:14)

  • Loved: (1 John 3:1)

  • Accepted: (Romans 15:7)

  • A Child of God: (John 1:12)

  • Jesus’ Friend: (John 15:14)

  • Free: (John 8:36)

  • God’s Dwelling Place: (1 Corinthians 6:19)

  • God’s Treasured Possession: (Deuteronomy 7:6)

  • Complete in Christ: (Colossians 2:10)

  • Chosen: (Colossians 3:12)

  • Called: (2 Timothy 1:9)

  • An Ambassador: (2 Corinthians 5:20)

  • God’s Masterpiece: (Ephesians 2:10)

  • Able to Do All Things: (Philippians 4:13)

  • More Than a Conqueror: (Romans 8:37)

Recommended Resources

Peer Counseling at Neighborhood Church | www.ncvisalia.com/counseling

  • The purpose of Peer Counseling is to provide a place where those who are hurting can find acceptance, help, hope, forgiveness, and encouragement.

  • Our counselors receive extensive training, ongoing supervision, and continuing education from licensed counseling professionals.

California Peer-Run Warmline | Call or Text: 1-855-600-WARM

  • Provides mental and emotional support.

  • Trained counselors will hold space, listen, and support you.

National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) | 1-800-950-6264 | Text “Helpline” to: 62640

  • Offers peer support, answers questions, and provides practical resources and next steps.

  • Designed for people living with a mental health condition, their loved ones, and caregivers.

988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline | Call or Text: 988

  • If you’re in suicidal crisis or emotional distress, there are options available to help you cope—dial 988 from anywhere in the U.S. to get connected.

Other Resources

Encouraging Scriptures for the Holidays

Here’s a list of Scriptures to encourage and sustain you through the holiday season. These verses remind us of God’s love, faithfulness, and strength in every circumstance:

When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed

  • “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” – Matthew 11:28

  • “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7

  • “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” – Isaiah 41:10

When You’re Grieving

  • “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18

  • “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” – Revelation 21:4

  • “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” – Matthew 5:4

When You Feel Alone

  • “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” – Hebrews 13:5

  • “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” – Matthew 28:20

  • “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” – Psalm 23:4

When You Need Peace

  • “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” – John 14:27

  • “The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace.” – Psalm 29:11

  • “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” – Isaiah 26:3

When You Need Strength

  • “I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.” – Philippians 4:13

  • “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” – Isaiah 40:31

  • “The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and He helps me.” – Psalm 28:7

When You Need Hope

  • “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

  • “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” – Romans 15:13

  • “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.” – Hebrews 6:19

When You Need to Remember God’s Love

  • “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 8:38-39

  • “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” – 1 John 3:1